I’ve been thinking about moms a lot lately, most poignantly due to the recent death of a mom from the next village. A mom who has several of her children employed by COTP.
One sister came to tell me that their brother had received a phone call saying that their mom had died and she was waiting to find out if this was true. Minutes later, another sister came into my office, not even getting the words out before she fell into my arms, sobbing at the reality of her mother’s sudden passing. The first sister soon ran by, desperate to get home to her family. I cannot specifically recall ever meeting their mom. But I work with several of her daughters and they are, truly, some of my favorite people on earth.
Several of us went to the funeral last week. They spoke of the woman’s faith, her involvement in her church, and her family. We could not see her kids for much of the service, but I felt their pain as I recognized their agonized voices crying out over the loss of their mom. I could see their tear stained cheeks as I hugged them at the end of the service and I watched the physical support they required as they sobbed their way to the cemetery. Their grief and sadness is real and raw and will continue long into the future.
I didn’t know their mom, but I am so thankful for these women, her daughters, and I am so thankful for the way she raised them to be good friends, to take care of their families and to love others. I am so sad that my friends are hurting, but I am so thankful that they grew up with their mama at their side, protecting and teaching them.
And while they process their loss, I am thinking about so many of our babies, the ones that live with us and the ones in our formula and mamba programs. The ones who have already lost their mamas before they even know what this means. They aren’t old enough to process the loss and their mamas are already gone. We’ve heard so many variations of the same story. Her mom died during childbirth, his mom got sick when he was a week old. She breastfed for a couple weeks before her mom died, we don’t know why his mom died. So many babies without their mamas. So many babies without that person who is supposed to be their first protector, their advocate, their model for a successful life. The injustice for these babies is a lot to process.
Thankfully, many of these babies have family members who have become their protectors, advocates and models. Single dads, grandmas and aunts are stepping up to raise these babies the best that they can, but it is hard. And for some, it is too much. They simply do not have the time, the resources, the strength to commit to another child. They need help. We have a few of these babies here right now, babies without moms, whose families are trying to figure out a plan. Babies who we want to be raised in their families, babies whose futures we are praying for, babies whose futures we don’t know. We pray for these babies without mamas, we pray for these families without answers. And we pray that the right decisions are made to allow these babies to grow up in healthy, stable homes that will teach them to love Jesus with all that they are.
And of course, this wouldn’t be complete without thoughts of my own mama, who has passed on many of her traits to me. Who has constantly supported me. Who has raised me well and (mostly) willingly allowed me to come live here in Haiti. And I am so thankful for her and my dad. Thankful that they have always been there for me and thankful for their love. :)
I know it’s early, but my thoughts and the holiday don’t quite coincide, so Happy Early Mother’s Day! As you celebrate or remember your own moms, please keep our nannies and babies in your prayers while they celebrate their first mother’s day without their mamas.
